mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
