Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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