Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
i just google imaged poop.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
