you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I would fuck him just for his dog
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize