so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Randomize
