Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
Just got invited to a tree party by some random chicks. They're literally just sitting up in a tree with a handle of rum and a box of goldfish crackers and yelled at me as I was walking by...
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
