That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
