If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
