HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I had to cum in my sink.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
