I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
