you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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