& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
