So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
you never un-have a 4some
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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