dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
Randomize
