You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
The Uber driver took us to a Waffle House. We didn't even say anything when we got in. MAGIC.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
She referred to my balls as rotund and handsome
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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