I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
