i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
This baby is an asshole
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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