halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
i don't think they understood the house was collapsing. they kept dancing and jumping and asking for more cups.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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