he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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