I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
