oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize