No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
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