is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
