my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
