sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
