After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
I just watched your sister pour half a bottle of cotton candy flavored snow cone syrup into a bottle of marshmallow flavored vodka, take a swig, frown, and pour a cherry coke in.
Just wait until she offers you a "powerita"
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
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