that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
