My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
