I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I wonder if i could put a dildo on my bike seat to encourage me to exercise.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
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