If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
did i walk over a car last night?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
