so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
