is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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