I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
