So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
