I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
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