Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
Randomize