what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Last time I sleep with a guy with a penchant to fragrance his dick. Every time I sit to pee, I get a whiff of Axe body spray.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
