you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
