Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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