Define "chronic" masturbator.
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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