i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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