so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
