You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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