Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I also was calling every child by their name "Birthcontrol" - straight people are fun
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
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