16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
