I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Randomize
