Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
just tell him i said nine months
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
