i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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