Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize