that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
